28...38...48

I started this post two weeks ago...on a Sunday where I woke up to 28 degree weather, at age 38, struck in an oddly profound way by Whitney Houston's death at age 48. I didn't realize that only 10 years older separated us. She seemed so mature and accomplished - certainly something that more than 10 years should earn. I suppose that some of that feeling for me is because she "made it big" at such a young age. Had we each been 10 years older when I first learned of her and she had first "made it big", I don't think it would have felt like such a huge gap between us. So considering how young we both were when she became famous and thinking about her life being so short, I began to feel incredibly unaccomplished.
Of course, this is a little natural (I think) when a celebrity dies. I mean, part of why these folks are famous is because they have some amazing talent and/or have accomplished something amazing. All the same, whenever I hear of someone's death (someone who I don't know) and all of the stories that follow - usually stories of wonderful things they have done in their lives told by people who loved them dearly - I naturally go down the road of "and what will be said about you when you die?" I know the things that I would like for people to be able to say about me. Someone else will have to tell me what actually gets said when we re-unite on the other side. But I loved what one reporter had to say about Whitney Houston's death and the stories that would follow. He said, "When the eulogies have ended let the memories rest in peace..." It was as if he was saying, "You're going to be tempted to pull stuff up from the past and try to fill in gaps and make up stories...or even tell unflattering stories...and I'm asking you not to." He went on to say how we needed to remember that to some she was just an actress and a singer and to others she was a mother, a daughter, a friend, a niece, etc... That statement made me think less of the 10 years that separated us and made me think that at the end of it all, we're all the same. We are not necessarily what we've accomplished, but we are who we are in relation to other people.

friday quotation

A simple but powerful message from Maurice Sendak in an interview on NPR last December:
"...live your life, live your life, live your life..."

Thank you, Maurice, for those obvious but easily forgotten words.

friday quotation

Your time is limited, so don't waste it living someone else's life. Don't be trapped by dogma - which is living with the results of other people's thinking. Don't let the noise of other's opinions drown out your own inner voice. And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary.
~Steve Jobs

I know that Steve Jobs has been quoted ad nauseum lately. But I still thought these words of his were worth sharing. Loving hearing my inner voice a little more lately...still need to keep my ears tuned keenly to it.

friday quotation

We do not see things as they are, we see things as we are.
~Anais Nin

I took a photography class last weekend and while I will not even begin to profess to be an overnight photographer, it did really make me think about how we look at the world, what we look at in the world, how we see things in the world...and our place in all of that. One of my favorite pictures is this very simple one...which seems appropriate as we've been blessed with some extra water from the sky over these past 24 hours!

self-care Sunday

Not the sort of self-care related to showering or brushing my teeth or flossing daily or wearing clean clothes or even exercising and eating well. Those are things that I've pretty much got down pat at my age! But I'm not so great at the more emotional, less "to do" list part of self-care. More than anything, I'm not so great at stopping and letting myself sit and be still and lounge around. But this morning was perfect for doing just that and although I could have gone for a run (once the rain stopped) or a walk or something like that, it was really just what I needed to stay in my pjs, make some hot tea, catch up on some reading, get the laundry and the cooking going, light a few candles in my cozy space and just sit. And listen to the rain on my window. And enjoy being home. It was one of those weeks where I didn't get home until 9 or 9:30 any night (except for Saturday night when it was a quiet night of Downton Abbey - SO excited to find it plays on Saturday night here, too! Particularly helpful since I missed last week's show.) so being at home was just what I needed. And while there were little tapes in my mind playing messages like "you should get out and run" or "you should go to church", I managed to put the "shoulds" aside and go with the "needs" and the "needs" were all about taking care of myself and having a little hermit time.
And in my hermit time, I found a great quotation that seemed to touch on just what I was feeling: "You cannot keep giving to others if you do not give to yourself, first. It is like pouring water from a vessel: you cannot pour and pour without ever refilling it - eventually, it will run dry. Like that vessel, we, too, need to refill, recharge, re-energize. We need to replenish ourselves, by loving and giving to ourselves." (Leslie Lobell) So this morning was a little gift to myself. And just enough to refill that vessel so that I can start the week renewed, enjoy my photography class this afternoon (new territory for me!), and soak up some yoga this evening...a little work in between all of those things. But work that's being powered by rest and renewal and not merely a "should" complex. Just what I needed.

friday quotation

Seems appropriate for this week of work...and love.
P.S. Happy birthday, Hunter!