friday quotation

Excellence is the result of caring more than others think is wise, risking more than others think is safe, dreaming more than others think is practical, and expecting more than others think is possible.

looks can be deceiving...

...or some things I learned on Sunday at the Memorial Hermann Ironman 70.3 triathlon.

- water that looks relatively smooth from the dock/shore can actually be QUITE choppy when you're in the water as a swimmer
- winds that appear to be headwinds can actually be head/crosswinds so that you don't get a lot of help when you change directions on a bike
- run courses that look "easy" because they are relatively flat can mess with your brain...especially when you have to do four loops
- people who seem to have their mental game together when it comes to post-race analysis can actually convince themselves that they didn't have a great race
- AND people who do that can also, with the help of many friends, snap back to reality and within a day or two start to reflect on all of the good and feel proud of what they accomplished

I know all of this from experience...and because I am one of those people who experienced all of those things over these past few days.
Now on to the report (if you like short versions of things, stop reading now...).
Easy trip down to Galveston with Jess...except for the horrible accident that led us on a little detour, but more importantly, that looked like some folks didn't make it to Galveston or wherever they were going at all. That's always very sobering to me.
But once we arrived, it was pretty much all smooth sailing. Quick packet pick-up, chatted with Logan along the way, discovered that we weren't going to get t-shirts because they'd given out the wrong sizes the day before...and also discovered that the t-shirts were all running SUPER small so maybe I'll be thrilled with whatever size leftover I may or may not receive because I'm pretty sure the small I ordered would have fit over maybe one of my arms. Bike check-in...saw Amy and Catharine...and finally we made our way to the hotel. Easy check-in. A little bit of downtime and race prep. Met up with Carrie, Rhonda, Jerry, and the Moons for dinner at De Bella's for a carb-rich meal. Pasta. Chicken. Salad. And then home for some SLEEP. Note: I was pretty sleep-deprived going into this week. Not the best race prep.
Alarm went off bright and early and pretty soon thereafter, Jess and I had loaded up my car and were on our way to the race site. EASIEST drive and parking EVER. Saw Chris, Kevin, John, Tammy, and Dina right off the bat and then got to work setting out our transition stuff, pumping up bike tires, and remembering to eat breakfast and apply sunscreen (yes...I did apply sunscreen even though my currently leathery back doesn't suggest it!). Slowly but surely other T3 folks arrived...Carrie and Jane were racked near me with Cheryl right across from me and Amy, Catharine, and Jen down the row a little ways. Always nice to see familiar faces. We made our way over to the T3 tent and hung out there waiting for everyone to gather. More sunscreen. Tried to eat a banana - too ripe so I gave up. Team photo and a few photos with Amy and others and then it was time to head down to the swim start.
We were in a pretty late wave...to be more specific, the second to last wave which didn't start until nearly 8:15 a.m. So we got to get a good look at the course and watch the waves build and build. It was nothing like the day before (when the swim had been canceled all together), but the little white caps on top of the water didn't necessarily excite us! Finally, it was time to go down to the pier where Logan was announcing the race start. For some reason it's just really nice to have him as a familiar face and voice at the start of these races...even if he was telling us it was a great day for a swim with smooth, flat water. Riiiiiiight.
When it was our turn to go we walked to the end of the pier and literally "walked the plank", jumping off into the water, holding our goggles, and hoping not to swallow much of the murky, brown water below. We got tossed around a bit before the countdown began and then we were off. Phew. It always feel so much better to just be going!
I found some open water pretty quickly on the first stretch and tried to fall into a good rhythm but the waves were not being particularly kind. I remember thinking it was a bit like CDA last year...but with gross salt water and not nearly as many people! Turned at the buoy to be greeted by waves in my face. AWESOME! I felt like I was swimming in an endless pool but I just put my head down and tried to make forward motion. Evidently I did because soon I was in the middle of some women from the waves in front of me and at long last I could see the paddle boat which signaled our turn into the shore. Tried to draft off of a super fast woman from the wave behind me as she flew past me but that didn't quite work! Oh, well, worth a shot...and it certainly got me moving.
As I came out of the water I saw Mo, Esther, and Michelle - so cool - and then I dropped for the wetsuit strippers. Who. Were. Awesome. In what felt like a nano-second I was back on my feet and headed into transition. Note - it was probably a good thing that I didn't notice that my swim time was 5 minutes slower than last year because I would have probably convinced myself that there would be no PR happening today.
Saw Jess in transition - GO JESS - and soon I was headed out of transition and onto my bike. I actually remember being relieved because the swim was so choppy. Which is saying a lot because I usually LOVE the swim. Headed out to the sea wall, took a right, and said hello to Mr. Cross/headwind who would be our lovely traveling companion for the day. Oh, well. Nothing to do about it but settle in and ride. And so I did. Saw some other T3ers out there - we had a big crowd in Galveston for the race - and I was actually feeling pretty strong. Not quite hitting the speeds I wanted. But I hadn't really calculated on a super fast bike ride with a head/crosswind! Finally hit the turnaround and was thinking that MAYBE we'd catch a break and get a little tail/crosswind on the way back. Well, not really. Perhaps we had a little one because I did negative split on the bike and I know my legs were anything but fresh at that point! Pretty uneventful ride overall (except for the dude who almost took me out at the last water stop!), but I do remember feeling strong which was really nice. And I passed a few folks with race wheels and aero helmets which is always fun! Finished in a little over 3 hours at just under 18 mph so I was pretty thrilled about that!
Left my bike in transition, grabbed my running gear, and realized it must have been a low point in race finishers because Logan was announcing my return to transition and then my exit from transition. Thank goodness I didn't stop to visit the port-a-potty or the world might have heard that, too! Kidding...it's always nice to hear your name and get an extra vote of confidence. Thanks, Logan! I could tell right away that my legs were feeling good. And I got some extra pep in my step from the T3 cheering area...Nancy, Karen, Mo (who gave GREAT advice to dump water on my head every chance I got to keep cool), Landon, Eric, and others. If you've never experienced a team like T3 cheering for you, you have really missed out. I cannot begin to put into words what a difference it makes. And when you do a race with so many teammates, you get those little boosts all along the course as you see familiar faces. Legs loosened up pretty quickly and the first lap flew by...with an appearance by Michelle and Charles in an unexpected place - awesome...literally (8:47/mile - oops!). Laps two and three felt pretty good, too, although I could feel myself fading a little (as is evidenced by my paces! 9:20/mile and 9:46/mile). I tried to be diligent about water and salt and ice and sponges and nutrition, but I wasn't as good about nutrition as I needed to be. Nonetheless, I did my best to catch Rhonda (didn't quite do it!) and just hold a solid pace all the way to the end. Passed my dreaded 10-mile marker (where I've historically fallen apart!) and knew I was headed to the end. I thought I'd be able to really kick it in but my legs were having none of that so I dialed it back a little...I wanted to be able to run across the finish line!...and I settled into a steady groove. Saw a few folks who had finished and were kindly cheering me on and then I saw the finish line. This time I got to go to the "finishers" side of the signs and that felt pretty darn good. On a four loop course, it's as much about the mental game as it is about the physical game.
Crossed the finish line to see Rhonda and John still in the chute...and Mo, Charles, and Michelle just outside of the chute. Fun! Claimed my medal and, more importantly, my bottle of water. Peeked at my watch and saw a 2 minute PR. AWESOME! (I want to go on record as saying that immediately after the race I was thrilled to even have been able to steal a 1 minute from that course on that day!)
Chatted with friends and then made my way to the T3 tent to grab my recovery drink and see some other folks. Everyone had had a pretty rough day but was feeling pretty good about finishing! LOTS of first time 70.3-ers which was AWESOME. So cool to be on the course with them...YAY! And others who were seeking PR's or just good practice. Or both.
Quick trip back to the finish line to see Amy and a few others finish...this time I had a Sprite in hand which was making my tummy and my blood sugar levels happy. Back to the tent again, found the showers...ahhh...such a treat, and then the gathering of the "stuff" to start to head home. I was sorry not to be able to stay to see all of the T3-ers finish but Jess and I had a good 3.5-4 hr drive back and after a race you never know just when the weariness is really going to hit you.
So looking my very post-race best in my shorts, t-shirt, and compression socks...yes, it's a sexy look...I hopped behind the wheel and Jess and I headed back to Austin. Of course, we rehashed the race....and made note of the lovely scenery between Austin and Galveston. Yeah. I'm kidding. It's not that lovely until you hit 71 heading back into Austin...and then it's wonderful. And it's home.
And at home that's when I unpacked and took a look at my race stats. And started to get conflicted. At first I was thrilled with a 2-minute PR even though I thought it was a little laughable. And then I became bummed about only a 2-minute PR. I felt like I was SO much stronger than last year. Certainly more than 2-minutes stronger. And what was I to make of the fact that my swim was 5 minutes slower than last year?! Thank goodness I cut 4 minutes off my run time because I needed that time to balance out my swim!
Four days and many conversations...with both myself and others...later, I'm finally in a good place about this race. I know, it's silly. To get worked up over 2 minutes. (I didn't want to get caught up in the numbers, but I'll admit that I did.) To have been upset that I had thought I could do better and forget that any PR is a great thing. To have forgotten that I gave it my all, that I felt strong, and that I was a happy, happy girl while I was racing. Thanks to my friends, teammates, and family, I'm back in touch with a better reality. And this reality reminds me that I have improved, that my training is paying off, that I really do love this sport, that it's a cool thing to be able to see where you've come from and where you still want to go with it all, that training alongside people is a gift, that having coaches who care is priceless...and that there's every chance that I'll be well-prepared and be ready to put these months of training to the test on June 27. (And between now and then, I have a few things to work on...) So, yes, looks can be deceiving. 5:57:35 might not look that different from 5:59:56 but it's HUGE. And more than 2 minutes huge. Huge because it reminded me to look beyond the numbers. Huge because it represents me pushing myself to go faster than I thought I could go. Huge because it helped me remember that if I only think about times, I'll miss out on what's most important about racing. So, thanks Galveston for the wind...and the waves...and the sun(burn!)...and the invaluable lessons. See you next year :)

yoga Monday

Last class with Deralyn...and all by myself. Which turned out to be a good thing as we were both a tad sore. Me from my 1/2 Ironman yesterday (race report coming...I promise...still "digesting" it all). Deralyn from her 5 hours of yoga yesterday. I told her that required the same endurance as doing a 1/2 Ironman! So it was cool to get to have a "tailor-made" class throughout which we chatted and laughed some as we were unable to go deep into certain postures...and at how good it felt to end the class with our legs over our heads up against the wall. Which is, by the way, the only posture I was pretty sure I'd even be able to do today.
As usual, she left me with a little gem of a reading. And, again, I felt as if it was directed to me. I know, I was the only one in the class, so it sort of was. But she didn't know that when she chose it. It was all about spontaneity and learning to trust the moment and go with it. About living life a little less planned and a little more freely. This is something I absolutely struggle with. I'm a planner who would like to be more spontaneous. A type-A, organized, although sometimes slightly messy in my organization, person who would like the take more breaths now and then and just go with the flow. The good news is that I feel like I get opportunities to practice being more spontaneous all the time these days in my work and play...so now it's about taking a deep breath and becoming more comfortable with that! But on that note I MUST go plan AP exams...I cannot be spontaneous with those.

friday quotation

The essential thing in life is not so much conquering as fighting well.
Baron De Coubertin, Founder of the Modern Olympic Games

These words, along with all of the inspiring races that friends of mine have had recently, will be on my mind as I go into my race this weekend. Or is it a training day? We'll see what Sunday holds as I give it all I've got and "fight well", regardless of what demons, times, or PRs I conquer (or don't conquer)! Looking forward to seeing what this 70.3 will tell me about myself...and feeling lucky to be experiencing it with so many teammates and friends.

yoga Monday

YAY...I actually made it to yoga this morning. And, as always, I was glad that I did. As is often the custom, Deralyn asked us to choose an intention. Today mine was very simple: BREATHE. I didn't do a whole lot of breathing last week and I wanted to at least start this week off breathing! As we worked through the class, in a hot room full of a little more incense than I care for (especially at 6:30 a.m.), Deralyn suggested that we re-focus. That we return to our mat if we've drifted away and that we not worry about how we were on the mat yesterday or last week or last year. That we check our yoga ego at the door and just be wherever we are today. Okay. Was she speaking to me? Maybe. Or maybe she was speaking to all of us and that's something we all struggle with.
Either way, it spoke to me...with regard to yoga and triathlons and life. For example, I have a race/"training day" in Galveston this weekend. It's a 70.3 so it's no small distance. I did it last year so I know the drill. But because I did it last year, I have a time on that course. And, because I am who I am, I want to beat that time from last year on that course. (Curses...maybe I need to only do courses once so I don't put myself in this predicament!) Glad that I went to yoga this morning because I need to ponder checking my triathlon ego at the door for the rest of the week and on Sunday for sure.
Okay, I need to do more than ponder it. I need to do it. I need to go into Sunday and let it be whatever it's going to be. It might be less humid than last year but more windy. It might be just as humid and hotter. It might be sunnier or cloudier or, or, or... Basically, I need to take the day for what it is, control the things I can control, listen to my body, feed from my fellow teammates and their energy and return it all the same...and not worry if I don't match or beat my time from last year. A million factors could affect that and it's only my ego getting in the way when I worry about not PRing. I could have a great race and somehow be slower. Got that ego? You better behave or you will be left behind when I head to Galveston on Saturday!
P.S. Unrelated to ego checking...Deralyn is no longer going to be teaching or 6:30 a.m. yoga class. So sad. Seriously, do my teachers and coaches know that I do not deal well with change?! I know, it's good for me and all of that stuff; but I much prefer my routine and some consistency. Feel like the past few months have been a good lesson in flexibility...and not the type you get from yoga.

weekend stew

No, I didn't make stew this weekend. (Although the weather was good stew weather...overcast, even a little cool, rainy...)
But the events of the weekend were a little like tossing a bunch of ingredients that you like in a big old soup pot, letting it simmer, and eventually coming out with a fabulous result.
Friday night brought an art show (my students are amazingly talented!) and a great catch-up session with Laurie (who sadly...for me...moved to Boston last fall).
Saturday brought uncertain weather and a 90 mile bike ride. And, well, those two things don't really get along in my world. So...a bunch of us headed to the PTC to do a 4.5 hour trainer ride. That was definitely a record for me. Never been on the trainer for that long in one sitting. THANK GOODNESS for Chrissie who coached us through the whole thing. Seriously, even with good music, interesting IM videos, and friends all around, 4.5 hours on the trainer is tedious. Not to mention tiring. So having Chrissie coach us made the time pass much more quickly. And it made me push myself, which I did. I really did. And that was cool.
Quick brick with Jess after...quicker than I would normally go but I didn't want to fall too far behind Jess. When we got back to the PTC she said, "Good job. I nearly ran you into the ground, huh?" I panted, "Yes. What was up with that?" And like a good teammate she said, "I know you could do it." I told her it was a good thing she got that speediness out of her system because our 20+ mile run would not be done at a sub-9 pace!
Saturday afternoon was full of more friends...hooray! Coffee with Rebecca...long overdue and wonderful as always. Phone call with Blythe...also long overdue and wonderful as always. And then a game time decision not to go to the Old Settler's Music Festival. I really needed to rest rather than go the music festival BUT I really wanted to see Patty Griffin and Jimmy LaFave so I was ready to go. And then the skies got dark. And then the skies opened up with thunder and rain. And Amy and I were glad that we'd decided to stay home! Early to bed...and 9 hours of sleep (!!!!!) so that I could get up for a 20+ miler with Jess. (Running that is.)
We did a route that took us from Barton Springs, up Exposition, across 35th to Jackson and then on to Bull Creek and Hancock and eventually Burnet, up Burnet to Anderson Road, turn back around and head south until Justin Lane, Justin over to Lamar, and "down" Lamar all the way to the trail...quick trip up the north side of the trail to I-35 and then over to the south side of the trail back to BSP. Right around 23 miles. Nice. With a steady, conversational pace. And I actually felt pretty darn good the whole time. EXCITING. Don't get me wrong, the parking lot at BSP was a welcomed sight and I was moving very slowly after but I never hit the proverbial "wall" that I've hit on other runs. Maybe this is improvement?
A soak in the springs...breakfast tacos + coffee at Whole Foods...and then power washing at Amy's!!! Woo-hoo!!! I love that sort of thing so I was excited when Amy suggested I could come over and help. Her house now looks sparkly and clean...it's VERY cool. And since we worked so hard, we had to treat ourselves to some food...YUM. I was super hungry. Good thing that I ate before I went to the grocery store or else I would have bought everything in sight. I forget how hungry a 23 mile run makes me...for the rest of the day.
A quiet evening of work, laundry, cleaning, catching up with family - HAPPY BIRTHDAY, DAD!!!, and cooking/baking...and then a VERY pleasant small world story that I just have to share with you.
So on Friday when I was talking to Laurie (friend mentioned at beginning of blog who is now in Boston) we were talking about the Boston marathon and how crazy the city of Boston goes over it. I inquired if she was planning to cheer and she said, "Yeah, I think so." I told her she HAD to...partly because I had a couple of friends running it and I couldn't be there to cheer them on and because all runners LOVE the folks who are cheering for them at races. Fast forward to Sunday...I get an instant message from Dionn (T3 training buddy...fellow walker along the shores of Lake Coeur d'Alene last summer during IMCDA...been training like a MANIAC for Boston...goooooo, Dionn!). She says, "Elizabeth! Guess who I ran into today here in Boston? Your friend Laurie!" I literally let out a yell in my living room. I'm sure my neighbors were slightly worried. Anyway, they were both on the "T" on Sunday evening and Laurie spotted someone in a UT jacket with a few people with Rogue Running jackets. In true Laurie style (which I love!), she approached them and said, "Are y'all from Austin?" And from there, the conversation began...yes...they train with Rogue...Laurie was just talking to me the other night about some friends who were running Boston...was I there? No...do I train with Rogue? No. But I train with T3...Dionn chimes in, "Who's your friend?" Laurie replies, "Elizabeth Guice". And, well, insert the Disney "It's a Small World" tune here because I'm sure that "T" car in Boston was filled with all sorts of shrieks and laughter. Anyway, for some reason, it just did my heart good for this sort of lovely randomness to happen in this world.
Perfect way to end my "weekend stew"...a mixed pot of all sorts of things that I love, simmering to the point of being just right.

friday quotation

Blessings only come to those who notice.

This felt like a good one for this week...a week when I was MIA from blogging...a week when the days flew by...a week when I felt oddly disconnected from everything (including my own life!) because everything was happening so quickly.
Finally, on Friday I felt as if I could open my eyes from the speedy blur that had been my week to notice the blessings in my life. Some tangible reminders - hymn sing at school today, shared hugs, a call from an old friend, many email exchanges to ground me throughout the week, solid workouts that remind me that I'm in good health, April showers that are already bringing May flowers (and cooler weather), family, meetings that remind me that I love what I do, friends... I could go on and on and one...guess that means I'm on my way to noticing the blessings in my life? (And feeling ever grateful for them!)

(different sort of) yoga Monday

Evidently I was a little more wiped out than I thought from our camping weekend...or so my body told me when my alarm went off for yoga this morning. So instead of enjoying Deralyn's class at Yoga Vida, I enjoyed my old Ali McGraw yoga video on my living room. This is not necessarily a bad thing, it's just different. But I had some breakthroughs this morning right here in my living room:
1 - I was actually able to focus on the video and not the cobwebs that desperately need to be wiped away from the corners of my living room
2 - the postures still felt like they were giving my body a good stretch and a good work out, and I knew what modifications to make to make things easier or more difficult...whatever was needed
3 - maybe being on my own doing yoga this morning was a good thing because it reminded me that I can practice myself, that you can do yoga at your own pace, and that even though you might not prefer it, you really can have a meaningful practice in your own living room
I didn't read myself a quotation or find some "thought for the day" but I was giving a lot of thought Andy Rooney's blurb about the passage of time last night. He talked about how we're always looking forward to things tomorrow instead of enjoying things today...about how we need to slow down, stop planning for the future, and savor every moment. Thought it was good advice and seemed very appropriate as I was returning from a weekend where I wanted to stop time, stay in camping mode, and live wholly in the present as I'd been able to do while camping. Yes, maybe that was the real gift of the weekend - being able to be still, living in the moment, not worry about what was happening (or not happening) at home... I'm not terribly good at these things but I'm trying to learn them by practicing them.

corners and curves...

...and rounding them both.
I've been thinking a lot lately about the twists and turns of life. About how what is just around the next bend is unknown...which is both exciting and terrifying. Like last weekend just around the bend in the road was a cattle guard and a low water crossing with A LOT of water. That will get your adrenalin pumping as you hydroplane across the low water crossing because you didn't have a chance to stop, hop off your bike, and walk across. Phew. And this past weekend, riding on a route I've only ridden twice before, hitting high speeds on the downhills and hoping that nothing like that low water crossing from last week was at the bottom...or climbing up a hill and wondering just exactly when it would end. And even on our run today (up and down many of those same hills), Jess and I were talking about how time passes so quickly on a run when you're in new territory. I remarked that I thought since you weren't sure what was coming up, you didn't worry so much about where you were or where you were supposed to be according to your usual pace, etc...and because you really didn't know what was around the next bend, you couldn't dread it or relax into it too much. And so I feel like I eased around these unknown curves of training this weekend. But I also turned some major corners. Which is a bit reflective of my life in general right now. Funny how that sometimes works.
It was wonderful to get out of town with my T3 teammates and friends this weekend. About 15 of us headed out to Bastrop State Park for a weekend of camping, training, and general enjoying one another's company. And we did all of those things. With Logan's pop-up as our T3 headquarters, we cooked and got camp set up on Friday night...oh, and ate some s'mores. Saturday brought a beautiful day plus some more teammates from Austin who wanted to ride the Pedal Through the Pines routes that we were doing. 60 miles was the plan for the day...ended up riding about 63-64. My plan was to "ride my own ride" and to see what I could do. Since it was a shorter ride with a particularly wonderful stretch of smooth road on the tail end on 71 I decided I'd just see what I had in me. The first part of the ride was through the park. So pretty but incredibly twisty and turny and hilly. It took us a while to get out of the park but soon we emerged and hit more open road. I felt strong after that little park warm-up and so I politely passed a couple of folks and then found myself with long stretches of road in front of me and so I just let my legs go. I pushed up the hills and stayed strong in between. And much to my surprise when I looked up while looking for the turnaround point, I saw Logan, Jim, Jess, Booher, Dustin, and Suzanne at a church where they were clearly pausing for a moment to get water...and, as I discovered, turn around. (I would have ridden further as I was looking for a different landmark...oops!) This was awesome. I was expecting to see them, but more as they were headed back the same way I was coming as this is usually the pattern with the super fast folks. So it was cool to not be too far behind them. Really cool.
We all pulled out together and again, I found my groove and pedaled away from one or two folks and found my own stretch of the road. At one point, Jim (who was saving turtles and so he ended up behind me for a moment) remarked, "Wow, you're really having a great ride. What's changed? It seems like you've really turned a corner." I laughed and said, "I really don't know...and it might not last so I'm clinging to this ride and giving it everything I've got." Now people have been telling me that some cyclists really do turn a proverbial corner in year #2, but I was beginning to believe I wasn't one of them. However, the past two weeks have made me start to believe that perhaps I'm going around a curve with my cycling...not necessarily turning a sharp corner yet but easing around a curve.
And somehow after a night of s'mores, chicken sandwiches, french fries, beer, and sleeping in a tent with a floodlight we all got up to run on Sunday morning. Through the hills. With Logan saying it was a better road to run than it was to ride...ummm...I don't see his reasoning, but, okay. Jess and I took off with the rest of the crew that was running and soon settled into a groove. The idea was a 2 hour run and after numerous hills we were suddenly at our hour mark. Quick turn around and somehow I was thinking it would be fairly flat on the way back...not so. Jess had on her speedy shoes on the way back and my idea of keeping up with her quickly gave way to negative splitting. Which I did. And I felt strong as I rounded each curve and crested each hill. And my legs felt tired, too, and so I turned some mental corners. And somehow, miraculously, I did negative split. It was a great lesson for me in what the mind can do. My legs were a little more than shot from the ride...and then the 1st hour of hills...and yet somehow I was able to will them to go faster than they wanted to go. And that felt very cool.
So how does all of this relate to my life? Well, I feel like I've started to draw some healthy boundaries to make sure I'm living more authentically. To make sure that I'm being me and following my heart and living in a way that feels real and genuine. And that has meant sometimes saying "no" instead of always/usually saying "yes" and trying to be a better communicator and speaking my heart. And that involves rounding some curves and corners and not being sure what's around them...and it's a little frightening and a little exhilarating. Which is sort of the way in which life is reflected in training...and training is reflected in life.
P.S. When I came home from the weekend, my neighbor said, "You look very relaxed." And I thought...I am. Thanks to a weekend in the woods.

friday quotation

Time doesn't stand still, and you don't stand still. Things change within yourself, within your life, and within your sport.
~Priscilla Welch, British Marathon Runner

a "too much" tuesday

Well, four days of intense workouts. And three workouts on Tuesday. So maybe that's too much "Saturday, Sunday, Monday, and Tuesday"!
It's not anything unusual for me this training cycle. But coming off of a BIG training weekend and following that with a tempo run in the hills on Monday (oh, and yoga, too), well, by Tuesday night's core + spin workout, I was fried. Done. Spent. Exhausted. Drained. You get the picture. And those of you who have ever trained for anything know that I'm not unique in being in this place and feeling like this.
But what struck me as I was leaving the PTC Tuesday night was that I was oddly invigorated, too. At least mentally, and here's why.
ADRENALIN: I'm afraid I'm becoming an adrenalin junkie. And the only thing bad about that is that I'm not convinced it's that good for my endocrine system! That being said, I get a total adrenalin rush with each workout. Even if it's not a super strong one. But there is something amazing at a very physical level about pushing your body in this way. All sorts of feel good chemicals are released...stress is released...you feel empowered even if you're worn out.
INSPIRATION: Monday as I was running the hills by myself - no coach to yell (I mean, encourage me), no teammates to try to keep up with...just me and the hills and the stone delivery guy who saw me pass twice and looked at me like I was nuts both times - I asked myself (only once or twice?!) what the heck I was doing out there at 2:00 p.m. (having rearranged my workout schedule to accommodate a school function at night). Running the hills when it was hot and humid and I'd run 20 miles the day before. So back to my original question, "What was I doing out there?"
Getting my workout in, of course. Making my legs do something they really didn't want to do. Pushing myself past the point of comfort into a steady state of discomfort. Doing something that two years ago I never imagined I would do. And on this day, putting myself through both a physical and mental workout - the latter being just as tough as the former - and proving to myself (because really even the stone delivery guy wouldn't get it!) what I was made of. As I ran the last mile pushing much harder than my body wanted to go and willing myself to make the interval I had set on the first mile, all I could think about was "this is how you will feel in that/those last mile/s of Ironman and you will remember this and you will tap back into this workout and you will finish strong - or at least know that you can." And with that silly message I smiled and pushed myself up the hill at Meriden and down the hill on 12th Street, around the corner on Possum Trot and to my finish line. Yes, the workout was about much more than a 5K tempo run that day.
TEAMMATES: they really a priceless. And when you do some workouts without them...or when you make it through 20 miles on the trail after 100 miles on the bike the previous day with them...you realize just what a difference it makes to have them around. The support we provide one another is amazing. The encouragement unparalleled. And the shared experiences and emotions incredible. Beyond that, having the chance to see someone fulfill a dream is just one of the most wonderful things in the world, in my opinion.
Tuesday's triple workout ended up being more than my body really wanted to deal with on Wednesday morning when I ignored my alarm, slept an extra 10 minutes, and went to Stacy Pool to swim on my own instead of swimming at Circle C. Missed a practice with Chrissie...boo. But ended up having a great swim. Pretty much a non-stop set that I made up with different intervals and equipment. And again, as much of a mental challenge as a physical challenge. No one to "race against" in the next lane. No teammates to try to keep up with. No interval handed down by a coach. Just me, the 33.3 yards of lane, the dude next to me who was doing backwards butterfly, and my watch...and it was good training time. (And seeing Michelle in the parking lot after my workout was an added treat!)
Now it's Wednesday night and I opted out of our track workout tonight...trying to be "smart" about my training, taking advantage of a "rest" week, and needing to get some errands run! I'm appreciating the rest, the balance in my life, and feeling a little more on top of things other than my training. That being said, whenever I'm not at a workout I know I've missed out on something good...so I'll be back on the bandwagon tomorrow!

yoga Monday

A few weeks ago someone told me that I was still on my path of self-discovery. That I was, in fact, really only now figuring out who I was. Slow learner? Late bloomer? It's taken me 36 years to start figuring this out?! Problem was that I really couldn't argue with her. I knew she was speaking the truth. She said it without judgment; it was a mere observation. And it was dead-on.
Then today in yoga, Deralyn read from a book she often reads from (and one I happen to own which makes it very convenient for me to "remember" what she said word-for-word for my blog!) and it was an entry about growth and change and how the two take time. So much for a "namaste, Zen, peaceful feeling class"...my mind is now racing. In a good way. In fact, I wouldn't want it any other way. The words are good for me to hear: "Be patient with yourself. It takes time to work out issues, to worth through things. It takes time to learn lessons. The more important the lesson, the longer the cycle to work it out and work through it. We may live in a technical age, but our souls aren't technical. They're still connected to nature... The process of change is like planting a seed and watching it grow and bloom into a flower... Each stage of the process is important... It takes time for nature to change things in to what they're becoming. It takes time for things to develop. Be patient with yourself and life. Trust the process of growth." (Melody Beattie)
Hmmm...this has never been a strong suit of mine. Of course, I'm also not in very much control over it as nature seems to be leading the way...as I try to trust in what is to come and what already is.
P.S. Speaking of nature, a ladybug has decided to take up residence in my bedroom. Makes me happy each time I look to the ceiling and see it!

what's in a number?

So this weekend, among other things (like birthday celebrations and Easter and good times with friends), was about a lot of BIG numbers when it comes to IM CDA training. A 100 mile bike ride. Yes, Gran, you're supposed to drive distances like that, unless you're training for an Ironman. And then a 20 mile run. Another distance you really could drive. This is to and from work for me...something I would never think of running on a given day! By far, these were our longest rides and runs to date. I've done the distances before, a few times over now, in fact. But I think that perhaps no matter how many times someone might ride 100 miles in a lifetime, it's still a thrill. What's even more of a thrill is to have it feel even better than the last time you did it.
The Fitzhugh-Johnson City ride was the very first century that I ever rode. Last year when we did it, it was COLD and WINDY. But there was really nothing new about that given last year's training season. It was mostly COLD and WINDY. But I remember feeling particularly "spent" after the ride. I met up with Joe, Blythe, Laura, Yvonne, and Matt at Kerbey Lane when I finished, and I nearly fell asleep at the table. This year was a different story. For some odd reason, I felt incredibly strong from start to finish. I had joked with Jess that morning that maybe one day I'd wake up and just be fast on the bike and maybe that day would be today! HA! I wasn't quite fast but I certainly was faster than last year. Last year I averaged about 13.9 mph which is indicative of the wind but also makes me wonder what the heck I was doing and if I was perhaps pedaling backwards some of the time?! This year, I averaged 16.06 mph. If you know me, you will realize that this is like traveling at the speed of light for me over a distance of 100 miles...with hills. (If you don't know me, I don't really know why you care enough to read this...but you probably think 16 mph is pathetic...well, not for me!!) But the very best part of the ride was that I felt energized, able to keep up, able to push it, able to lead, and able to enjoy it. The day was ideal...cool in the morning and then plenty sunny and even warm (finally adding some color back to my arms, legs, and face after the winter!)...and the route is one that I love. It's something like 6,000 ft of climbing and is a lot like the CDA course so it's a great ride for us doing that Ironman. But it is also really pretty...lots of fields with animals (cows, antelopes with twisted antlers?!) and, in the right season, BLUEBONNETS and other wildflowers. And they were out in all of their glory this past weekend. And this time, we got the extra treat of crossing a low water crossing where there was actually a lot of water...next time I'll get off my bike and walk through such things. This time, I foolishly rode through and then willed my gears to work for me on the other side. Live and learn. But it was sort of exciting. And scary. Anyway, it's pretty much a ride that when the weather is good and you are feeling good reminds you of why you ride a bike instead of taking a country drive on a Saturday. And for me, Saturday was such a ride. Very exciting...and something that brings me both encouragement and gratitude.
Post-ride activities included a quick brick and then a birthday celebration complete with beer, ice cream cake, fajitas, guacamole, bocce ball, and good times hanging out with friends. Although nearly all of us were exhausted from the day's activities, it was just nice to be together without an agenda, enjoying a beautiful spring evening, hanging out in comfy chairs in a backyard with our feet up...pretty much, for me, the day doesn't get much better than that!
Sunday brought more numbers. Of note, a 20 mile run...broken up into two 10 mile loops around Town Lake from Barton Springs Pool. Of more significant note, the humidity was about 105%. Yes, that means what you think it means. It really should be raining, and sometimes it was, but mostly what we got was a veil of mist to run through. Every once in a while we caught a light breeze which we welcomed, whether it was a headwind or a tailwind. But mostly, it was a long, muggy run. And even though Jess and I pushed it and kept at what we thought was good pace, I have to admit I was disappointed to crunch the numbers post-run and see what our actual pace had been. And that is really the point of this post.
I've struggled (although not been 100% fixated) to not worry about that or count it as a "bad run" because of that pace. Really, what does it tell other than our speed over land? The bigger story to tell is how nice it was to run with Amy, Jess, and John...of how we pretty much looked like we'd already been swimming in Barton Springs before we even got back there to soak...of how we kept moving the whole time and even passed a few people...of how we were doing all of this after a 100 mile ride yesterday...of how we even felt like we were going faster than we were and might have even claimed to have felt "strong" at certain points along the way. THOSE are the more important parts of the story of our run and of my training.
And yet, I sometimes cling to the numbers. Don't we all?
When we're students, we look at our grades/GPA. When we're adults, we look at the salaries we're earning. When we're training, we look at paces and distances and calories. We always seem to be counting something in this world as if having more is always better and that whatever quantity we have of something (everything from college acceptances to job offers, dresses to cars...even friends) defines our self-worth. I talk to my students about this all the time these days. I would never let them define themselves based on college admissions offer, just as I know I should not define myself based on a pace or a time or a distance on one given day. Just because I didn't have the run I wanted to (well, I did...the pace just didn't confirm that!) doesn't mean that I'm a terrible runner. And just because I had a superb bike ride doesn't mean I'm an awesome cyclist. Both things just mean that at a snapshot moment in time, that's where I was...in my training...in my workout...on a given day. And like most other things in our lives, all of that could change in an instant, for better or worse.
SO, what's in a number? A lot. And nothing at all. Or maybe as much or as little as you want to give it on any given day. Which makes it all seem pretty darn relative.

friday quotation

Love yourself, for who and what you are; protect your dream and develop your talent to the fullest extent.
~ Joan Benoit Samuelson