yoga Monday

Unlike last week when my back was all sorts of wonky for yoga class, I arrived this morning feeling really ready for it - physically and mentally. It looked like it was going to be a private class until another girl, Emily, showed up. Emily and I are often in early a.m. yoga together and we have that little bond. It's funny because I've been doing yoga pretty faithfully (except for when there's a conflict or when I'm out of town) for over a year now at Yoga Vida and there is a little sense of community among us 6:30 a.m. folks. It's not the same by any means as the community of T3 (or any of the other places that I frequent with the same people day after day or week after week), but Emily would definitely be in my little yoga community if I were to draw one.
So, this morning it was just Emily, Malia (teacher), and me. And it was lovely. We took things at a slower pace, really holding positions and getting good stretches along with good adjustments. It was actually a treat to have such a small class and I definitely went new places in some old positions. There was actually a moment in one pose where I felt as if I was walking through a door to a whole new room (or world as it were...). Very cool. Funny that I've been doing that position for a year now and have never gone there. I have to think that somewhere else in my life I have created space that allowed me to walk through it - as if I wasn't being held back emotionally by something.
Which was actually what Malia shared with us today. She said at one point, "root yourself so that you can rise." She went on to explain that if we don't know what we're rooted in, if we're not really grounded in who we are or what we believe or how we want to live our life, we cannot rise to the next level, soar to the next height, go where we are supposed to go. It's a funny image really because it seems to contradict itself...the idea of digging deep and making sure your roots reach down and are strong...and at the same time reaching upwards and rising.
But it also makes sense. You can't really ever reach a new level with any sort of stability if you don't have a strong foundation. I feel on most days that I'm still building my foundation, filling in the cracks, leveling it out. And maybe I'll be doing that all of my life in an attempt to reach new heights. As time consuming as it is, it's good work, and I sort of hope I am always in a state of repair if it means I'm still growing and becoming the person I'm supposed to be.

yoga Monday becomes friday quotation

Because it's just been that sort of a week!!

We are happy, when however briefly, we become one with ourselves, others, and the world of nature.
~David Cole Gordon, writer and naturalist

friday quotation

Speak your mind, even if your voice shakes.

I've had this quotation in my "friday quotation" stash for a while now. And I promised myself that I wouldn't post it until I'd lived it (well, recently lived it) in a way that mattered. Like today. I speak my mind regularly (always?), but sometimes my voice shakes more than usual. I always worry that it will crack. It sometimes does. But I always seem to finish whatever I have to say. And even if my whole body is shaking at the end, it feels good.

yoga Monday

Back to my usual tricks with yoga Monday...and realizing that it's been at least a year (if not a few more weeks than a year) that I've been at it. Going to yoga regularly on Mondays. Except for when I've been out of town. And I love it.
I'm not always good at it. I know, that's not a very yoga-like attitude. I'm supposed to leave all judgment at the door but when you're surrounded by human pretzels how can you not think, "Hmmm...I'm not all that good at this." I am getting better at corpse pose :)
But the cool thing for me is that I ALWAYS look forward to yoga. And not because I think one day I'm going to wake up and be amazingly flexible or strong or "good" at it. But because I feel like there's always a little "gem" in each class...a learning...a take-away...sort of like a yoga Monday party favor to thank me for showing up to the class. (And our teachers always DO thank us for showing up to class!)
Today's class was full of little messages, but the one that I cannot get out of my mind is: "Look into your heart and find something to strengthen and soften at the same time." Oooh...this I'm good at. Okay, well not so good (yet!) at the follow-through but good at finding what that thing is. Always subject to change. Subject to being replaced and renewed. But I know just the little piece of my heart that will be softened when it's strengthened...or strengthened as it's softened.

podcast junkie

This summer...especially post-Ironman...I have discovered a new obsession. Podcasts. Some are shows that I have listened to regularly for a while now - StoryCorps, This I Believe, and This American Life. Others are relatively new to me - RadioLab, Selected Shorts, Wait Wait...Don't Tell Me.
Summer days are so quiet at school and I'm usually entering data, doing some form of paperwork, clearing out files, cleaning my office (or the faculty lounge!), etc... that it's been really easy to start one of these (often one hour) programs and listen to it from start to finish with very few interruptions. It's gotten so that I look forward to it each day. Will I learn more about sleep? or famous tumors? or parasites? or limits? or the secrets of success? or Lucy (and other chimps)? Maybe I will hear a great story or a touching exchange between a father and a daughter who have been separated for five years and reunited in a painfully honest conversation. Sometimes I cannot listen to one in its entirety because I lose focus or because it's too difficult (too sad, too painful, hitting too close to home). Sometimes I find myself laughing out loud at my desk - hoping no one else will come in and wonder why I'm laughing when I'm all alone in my office. From tears of sadness to tears from laughter, these shows will be vivid memories from this summer.
They offer me random bits of information, food for thought, feeling odd connections with people I don't even know because we're all experiencing some commonalities of humankind, chances to explore things I had not ever thought about...oh, and in case you think they are too "heavy", sometimes just pure entertainment! They also remind me of just how much I have to learn in this world and of all that there is to experience. But it's been a true pleasure to listen to all of these stories and let them bounce around my head the rest of the day...and night...and weekend. So if you find yourself bored with the usual stuff on the radio, check them out. They are well worth whatever time you dedicate to them whether it's an entire road trip or just a commute to work! Oh, yeah, and one of the toughest things about school starting up is going to be shifting my podcast listening to evenings and/or weekends only...

friday quotation

If you aren't pushing your limits, you aren't going far enough, and you still don't know who you are.
~Paulo Coehlo

decision made!

There comes a time in the life of every car when it has lots of miles, needs some repairs, has lived a good long life...and yet the owner decides she cannot and does not want to part with it!!!
For those who've been along for the ride of my car as it's hit 100,000 miles and celebrated its 10 year birthday, I've finally made a decision. Repairs shall be scheduled.
A detail job shall be given to my trusty Subaru for its 10th birthday.
And I shall drive it for many more moons...or suns...or however long it has left in it.
Or until it starts acting up or leaving me stranded or making me scared or sucking so much money from my bank account that car payments seem like a more favorable option (right...it's gonna have to get bad!). But so far, there's been NONE of that...except for some routine repairs (oh, and the little incident with the deer...see there, it might be 10 years old but it has a brand new driver's side!!)...and it's paid off...really, how can I part with it? Besides, it really does make me smile. In all of its "rough around the edges"-ness and with all of its dings and scrapes and all of its imperfect glory, I feel like this car is perfect for me. Not sure what that says about me, but I'm a tad loyal when it comes to cars. Might be relatively easy for me to part with clothes from my closet...but not my car. Funny I didn't even know I loved it that much...and have never considered myself a "car" person. Guess it's about the comfort, familiarity, and some weird commitment to it. Keep on truckin' little Subaru, keep on truckin'...