friday quotation

Enough is abundance to the wise.
- Euripides

I rarely turn to the ancient philosophers for quotations but this one crossed my path last week and it seemed to make a lot of sense...at least in theory. Not to put it into practice as I go through each day.

conferences...colloquiums...

...whatever you choose to call them, I have a love-hate relationship with them. LOVE them because they energize and inspire me. HATE them because my "to do" list when I get home is often monstrous, intimidating, and unrealistic. My time at Sarah Lawrence with the ACCIS group was in sync with my summer - wonderful and revealing. And also reassuring and just the right sort of gentle shove that I needed before returning to AUGUST at school. Honestly, there's nothing quite like August 1 to light a fire under me in terms of preparing for something. I feel like when August hits, school is pretty much here...and, well, it is!
But this year I get to go into it with new ideas, new reflections on schools (specifically NYU, Eugene Lang, Columbia, Barnard, Sarah Lawrence, Marist, and Fordham), new colleagues from around the country on whom I know I can call (and from whom I have a new set of resources!), and new optimism about what I can accomplish. I'm sure that I will encounter setbacks to my plans, switch around my goals, realign my ambitions with the realities of daily life, but, in general, this particular colloquium was less overwhelming and more encouraging. Or maybe that's just my frame of mind right now!

fading away

Not the sun...although it was when I flew from NYC to Austin this evening (via Baltimore).
Not summer...although with my return from NYC (vacation! plus some work, too) and the fact that it is now August, I do feel like summer is fading away. The 100+ degrees that greeted me in Austin at 11:00 p.m. this evening did not suggest that summer is fading away though.
But what I do feel like is fading away is my sweet Gran's circle of friends. She has lost two this past week. That seems cruel. One has hit a little too close to home for me. Sweet Jane who is the grandmother of Katy (I can't write "was" yet) passed away this morning. Gran and Jane have been friends for 50+ years. My mom and one of Jane's daughters (Allison) were in high school together. And then Katy (Allison's oldest daughter) and I were in college together. So we're three generations of friends. And there's something rare and rich and wonderful about that. I used to learn things about Katy from Gran and Katy would find out things about me from Jane when we were growing up. Whenever we were in New Orleans visiting our grandmothers at the same time we would play with one another. And although Katy grew up in Houston and I was in CA, we had this funny little bond. So it was quite funny that we both chose to go to UVA...and I think the grandmothers took great joy in seeing us develop our friendship there. Jane fell ill quite suddenly and this morning, quite literally, breathed her last. Katy is heartbroken. I'm heartbroken in a different way. Gran cried sweet tears of friendship on the phone with me today - which always rips my heart apart. And then (in the middle of the LaGuardia airport - awesome), I cried my own tears. For Katy. For Gran. For Jane's daughters and the rest of her family. For Gran's generation that seems to be fading away. They've lived amazing, and amazingly long (these women are all in their 90s!), lives. They've passed along wonderful stories and gifts and most of all LOVE to us. And I know we are blessed to have had them for so long. But I will still miss them. (And I did tell Gran that she needn't go getting any ideas about joining her friends any time soon!) Sweet dreams and sweet rest, Jane (and Ann B.)...your spirit lives on.

War Horse

I should preface this blog entry by saying that (much like other musicals, theater performances, concerts, art exhibits…and as cliché as it may sound) there is really no way to adequately describe War Horse to you in this entry. It was phenomenal. Not a self-described “horse person” – okay, maybe pretty far from a “horse person” given that out of fear I ended up grooming and not riding a horse for my entire first summer at camp (that is a story for another post…however, the story of “War Horse” made me think of sweet Mr. Ed. He was my own Joey.) - I enjoyed every minute of this production. The bottom line is that any animal lover, anyone who has ever loved or been loved by an animal (or a human for that matter), can relate to this story. I won’t re-tell it here, nor will I try to describe all of the high points for me, but I will say that it was another performance where I was reminded of the magic that comes with the theater. The ability to be truly transported to another place. For 2+ hours it was nearly impossible to see the wooden and leather structures that were being moved by people from within and without as anything but real horses. Joey – the main horse – came to life and literally grew up in front of our eyes. The actors and actresses who played Joey and the other horses were dancers, too. Not for a minute did I think, “oh, that’s just a puppet up there.” No. The horses neighed and swatted their tales and breathed and moved in ways that could have fooled anyone.
But, like most good performances, it was about more than just one thing. The story is replete with powerful relationships – some healthy, some not healthy – between mother and son, father and son, brothers, the powerful and the powerless, and on and on. The music was often the backdrop, but when the songs were the main focus their words were piercing. Refrains like “only remembered for what we have done, only the truth that in life we have spoken, only the seed we have sown, these shall pass on when we're forgotten..." can’t help but haunt you even as you leave the theater. Not in the way that I’ve been walking out of other theaters rushing to buy the soundtrack, but in the way that makes you want to take stock of your life and make sure you’re living it in the way that you want to be remembered.
And that is probably a great prelude to my conference that I head to on Sunday afternoon. We're going to be looking at the role of college counselors in the 21st century? Are we getting to do the job that we think we should be doing? Are we getting to be the people we think we should be at our schools/in our school communities? And for me, am I living out my life's work each day when I go to work? (Or at least the professional part of my life's work.) If I might be remembered in part for what I'm doing day in and day out at St. Andrew's, am I doing it in the way that I'd like to be remembered for. I know, that's a lot of thoughts for a three day conference...especially when we're going to be asking a lot of other questions!
I’m actually sitting in Grand Central Station right now, which is a beautiful little indoor refuge (I’ve already pointed out lots of outdoor refuges here!) in the city of New York. I found my favorite Joe’s coffee and treated myself to a latte. Oh my. First, it was beautiful – a little work of art on top. Second, it's just delicious. Then I wandered downstairs to find Dishes serving up fresh cups of fruit. Yes, please. Watermelon. Greek yogurt. Latte. Someone playing music in the background. An hour to write and read before my train to Bronxville. I’m a happy girl. And I’m a reflective girl. (That was your warning to stop reading now if you don't want to go there with me! I'm blaming this amazing latte that I'm drinking for taking me into some sort of reflective trance...)
I just spent 4 days pretty much alone in NYC. I have to say that is something that I probably never would have thought of doing five years ago…two years ago? Having the confidence to do that was wonderful. Being absolutely sure that I could make whatever I wanted to happen in those four days (within reason, of course!) happen was huge for me. I know, it’s probably not a big deal to a lot of people. It’s probably not a surprise to most people who view me as independent and capable of most things and all of that. I mean, if I was able to co-create (over the course of the past year) and make a trip to NM with eight students last month, why wouldn't I be able to handle myself in NYC. Or handle NYC by myself as the case might be. Maybe it was really just more about the fact that I would choose to do this. There are many things in life that we are capable of doing but we just never choose to do. I feel like there are probably a lot of things in my life that fall into that category. I think, small as it may seem, a trip like this reminds me that when (or if) I’m ever wanting to do those things, I definitely can.
So what was it like being in NYC for four days, on my own, without much of a plan? Well, it was wonderful. Freeing in that I didn't have to worry about anyone but myself - a real contrast to my trip to NM earlier this summer where I spent the whole time worrying about everyone but myself. And it was also revealing. I feel like my whole summer has been that! New Mexico was wonderful and revealing. My time in Austin was wonderful and revealing. And now my time in NYC was the same. Wonderful because there is a certain freedom to being able to create each day as it comes. To being able to listen to your pulse and stop and sit or keep walking or skip that museum or, or, or… And the revealing part: well, as wonderful as it was to be on my own (meaning that I wasn’t responsible for anyone else), I was reminded that I really don’t want to do trips like this on my own all of the time, for the rest of my life. Maybe once in a while. But not all of the time. There were too many moments that I wanted to share with someone. And while a perfect stranger might have welcomed my pointing something out to him/her, it would have been nice to have someone with me with whom I had some sort of previous relationship! I think I perhaps knew this about myself even before I took this trip but it was sort of nice to have it confirmed. And I learned similar things in NM and in Austin, that while so much of what I've created in my life is wonderful, there are lots of parts that I want to continue to tweak and improve upon. And you know, I love that. I think if I'm ever in the spot where I say "I've arrived...this is it...nothing more to do" in either life or work or relationships then I'm missing something. Doesn't mean I can't find peace in the present, just means that sometimes that peace is in the knowing that all is well...and that there is still more fine tuning to be done. (And the curtain closes on my rambling thoughts for the day...congrats on making it to the last scene of this production!)

a day in the life of a (visiting) New Yorker

Part of my challenge to myself on this trip to NYC was to find some stillness and relaxation in my travels. This was, after all, my summer vacation! If I ran around NYC at my usual frantic "got to see it all" pace, there would be no way to feel rejuvenated at the end of it. So although I covered some major territory while I was here, I also spent some time each day trying to do some less touristy and more "a day in the life"-ish activities. Such as some things I've already written about:
WEDNESDAY - time on the High Line + sitting in Washington Square Park + walking home through Central Park + dinner with family
THURSDAY - lots of Central Park time and then dinner at "home" (which means at my hotel...which means picking up dinner from a local restaurant and eating it in my room...because I was pooped!)
FRIDAY - yoga! But like no other yoga, I've done before. A lovely experience. Honestly. It was in a tiny studio - they encourage online registration because the room can only accommodate about 15 people. Two of us were there + our instructor (both of whom were SUPER friendly to this visiting Texan). And the practice was restorative, relaxing, challenging...the last of which I realized later in the afternoon. I found Zenyasa Yoga on the internet when I was poking around for things in "my neighborhood" and it sounded like a good place to go - plus it has free classes for first-timers to the studio. (Yes, there are some...actually LOTS...of free things in NYC if you look around.) I signed up for a Level 2 class figuring that I could handle it. And I could. I was fine. Catherine greeted me and told me a little about the studio, showed me where to leave my shoes, made a quick connection as a fellow teacher (she teaches at the college level), and then she welcomed my classmate Ellen. Ellen had been to Zenyasa Yoga once or twice and seemed very friendly. Since there were only two of us in the class and lots of interaction with the teacher, we bonded quickly as we shook our heads in disbelief about our ability to do some of the things that Catherine suggested over the next 75 minutes. But mostly, the three of us just filled the space with good feelings. I didn't know anything about this form of yoga, but Catherine explained it a little and then we jumped in. Or settled in as it were. Each class begins by acknowledging four things with a moment of silence ended by the chime of a bell and a bow. First, we bowed to the space in front of us to acknowledge our individual practice. Then Ellen and I bowed to one another to acknowledge our common practice. Next, Ellen, Catherine, and I bowed to one another acknowledge the relationship between teacher and student. And, finally, we looked to the windows facing 72nd Street (we were up on the 6th floor, by the way) to acknowledge everyone and everything thing in the world. Pretty cool way to start a practice.
A practice that included strength work and meditation and stretching and sun salutations...it really was an amazing combination of things. Each day focuses on an element (earth, fire, water, wood, or metal) and each week has a theme (meditation, breathing, anatomy of asana, 5-elements, or buddha dharma). The combination for Friday was: earth + meditation. Or focus on lower body strength, endurance, and flexibility (earth) + cultivating a steady seat and place for meditation. Oddly, I could use both of these things. The 75 minutes passed quickly. Nothing was too "hard" but there were definitely some strengthening poses and exercises that made my legs shake. Catherine adjusted my downward dog, led us through sun salutations, and made sure that we were in the correct position for each posture...the joy of a two person class! It was a treat. And the final treat (well, before the next teacher Jason offered us coconut water!!!) was that we got to take our final savasana with our legs up the wall...my absolute favorite! And much welcomed position after days of walking around the city. As we parted ways, Ellen and I found ourselves standing outside of the studio talking about her kids and my job like we were old friends. I swear if I'd been here long enough she would have invited me for dinner!
The rest of the day was a little more "touristy" as I made my way to Columbia and Barnard - ran into a current SAS student on the Columbia campus!!! - and then back to my hotel for a quick change of clothes before going to the MOMA. I felt a little like a "local" when I was there since one of my neighbors (who moved to Austin from NYC) had tipped me off to Target Free Friday Nights (yes, sponsored by Target). You can get into the MOMA free from 4-8:30 on Friday nights which is awesome! And was perfect for someone like me who really just wanted to pop in, see a few things, and then make my way to Dodd's show in SOHO. Mission accomplished...saw some favorites...saw some new stuff. And was soon on the subway to SOHO. Easily found the theater...and then some coffee in case I got the sleepies before the show (or during the show)...took shelter under an awning during a pretty awesome rain storm. And then happily ducked into the theater (where I got bumped up to the 3rd row!). Home again, home again, easily on the subway with a little gelato treat on the way. Have a mentioned that calories consumed while you are walking in NYC (or any other city, I suppose...but mostly while on vacation) don't count?! Did you know this? It's quite wonderful.
Got 8-9 hours of sleep on Friday night so that I was ready to go today...
SATURDAY: Coffee at Joe's. I love this place. Or maybe I love the baristas. Or maybe it's the pale blue "to go" cups. I don't know. But it makes me happy to go there instead of hitting up a Starbuck's for my morning cup of coffee. (There's one in Grand Central where I'll be grabbing coffee on my way to Bronxville tomorrow!) With my coffee in hand, I strolled through Central Park and found my way to the 82nd Street, St. Stephen's Greenmarket. Wanted to see what the locals could buy at their neighborhood Farmers Market. Berries, milk, veggies, flowers, bread...much like Austin farmers markets. Not a huge surprise there but sort of a fun thing to do. Seeing as I'm leaving for Bronxville tomorrow I only bought some fruit but it was nice to stroll and see the Upper East Side. I then snagged some yogurt from a local grocery and found a lovely shaded bench in Central Park for my breakfast spot...yogurt + Farmers Market fruit and full entertainment from the kiddos playing around me. This hit the spot! The afternoon went by quickly with double checking arrangements to Bronxville tomorrow a.m. (this will involve a subway - and a "transfer" within the subway system! - with my luggage...fingers crossed!), finishing my reading for the conference, packing, and grabbing a quick bite to eat at Peacefood Cafe. I know, there are more "exotic" places in NYC, but I felt the need for something really healthy. It's not that I've been unhealthy about my eating, but I have been rather nonchalant about it. That might be my one regret of this trip...I should have planned my meals better because every time I walk down a street I see a restaurant that makes me want to stop and eat! Oh, well, as Knox (Gran's dear friend) would say, "You have to leave something for next time" and what I have eaten has been delicious. (Plus, I do get a little tired of being at a table for one all of the time, so 'grab and go' food has been my preference this trip.)
About that dinner at Peacefood. Well, I ended up not eating alone. I chose to sit at the counter and pulled out my book but hardly 10 minutes had passed before a man who was probably in his late 60s/early 70s said, "Do you mind if I sit here?" Two girls had already occupied the other seats at the counter so we were a little crowded, but it wasn't my place to say "No, you can't sit here." Like I would say that anyway! And he seemed nice enough so I said, "Go right ahead." Moments later my food came out of the kitchen and that opened the doorway to what would be an hour long conversation with me and this native New Yorker who was amazed that I'd found Peacefood all the way from Texas, loved that I taught/worked at a school (he's a former professor), was concerned about what I'd seen and not seen in the city, had his own theories about education (which he shared freely), and then ended up paying for my meal. Because he rarely got to have "such nice dinner conversation with a Texan", he explained...with a shake of his head. The whole Texas thing really threw him for a loop. It was hysterical. We parted ways after I thanked him profusely, and I hung back to get a chocolate dipped macaroon. DELICIOUS. Seriously, melt in your mouth delicious and well worth every calorie!
And off I went down Broadway to Lincoln Center for War Horse thinking that this was the first time a perfect stranger had ever bought me dinner and how bizarre and nice it was at the same time. Not "nice" as in that thing that I expect or want to happen all the time but "nice" as in just a really nice gesture...from a real New Yorker to a visiting New Yorker. Seemed right for the day - unexpected but right.

friday quotation

"Don't sleep with mean people."

Okay, so out of context this makes no sense. But I just came from my cousin* Dodd's show - The Rap Guide to Evolution - and my brain is sort of spinning with everything that the show said and represented. And while I can't say that I agree with it all 100%, it certainly was clever and smart and intriguing and entertaining and a VERY worthwhile way to spend a Friday night in NYC. And the bottom line - "don't sleep with mean people" - is perhaps a universally good thing to keep in mind. The actor follows up that bit of advice with "think of your granddaughters and your grandsons" and pretty much says that you have to think about what could come out of your relationships...do you want your gene pool to be riddled with meanness?
I'm expanding this advice to the steps before you might sleep with someone and saying "don't associate with mean people...don't be friends with mean people...don't encourage mean people by being in any sort of relationship with them." Eventually, maybe that meanness will go away? Either through a lack of procreation or a lack of friends or community or encouragement or something...and a little less meanness in the world sounds like a good thing to me.
(*So...Dodd is technically a cousin of a cousin. We share first cousins in all of my Morrow cousins so we like to say that we're cousins, too. Dodd and I agreed on this so it's all good.)

hiding in harlem

Well, technically in the Heights but I thought Harlem sounded catchier - and it's close!
What a treat today. Not the Alexander McQueen exhibit at the Met - although that was pretty fabulous, too. And over-the-top and all of that. But my excursion via the subway to the 190th Street station where I hopped off, took an elevator to street level, and found myself in the middle of a little haven in the city - Fort Tryon Park and the Cloisters. The Cloisters are part of the Met and why I am just now learning about them I have no idea! They are fabulous. Serene. Majestic. Beautiful. A real treasure. And one of those times when I was glad to have pressed on. I had a few moments of uncertainty on the subway...and then even when I got off the subway. I almost just sat in the park (which would have been lovely, too). But I pressed on and was rewarded greatly. These pictures tell the rest of the story...or part of the story. And as if it was a sign that I was supposed to go, I found these fabulous things at the Cloisters...
first, there was St. Andrew in all of his glory: then, there was a little kale in the garden: and, finally, a little extra dose of grace - because one can never have enough!