We're here...

I was just about to write about our "long" day of travel yesterday but when I think about it, in travel terms, it was pretty "short"...and much shorter than many of my friends who were stranded, delayed, and all sorts of bad stuff! Yes, Jess and I had a "short" travel day - departing at 6:15 a.m. Austin time and arriving before 10:00 a.m. Spokane (and Idaho) time - and a relatively easy one with incredible "transitions" in the Denver airport (gate to bathroom to next gate in record time with only about a 10-15 minute window to work with...and a line at the bathroom!). Easy car pick-up in Spokane...a roomy Chevy Traverse which is giving me a chance to drive another car that I don't ever really want to own...but that comfortably held three bikes today (two of them being big boy bikes!), so I can't complain. A nice drive from Spokane to Coeur d'Alene...and a chance to get settled in our home away from home. It's a house walking distance from Ironman village and all of that action and it's INCREDIBLY spacious (with a guesthouse out back that is as big as any regular house!). Lots of families in CDA rent their houses out for this week because the entire town pretty much turns into an extension of Ironman village. Shopkeepers and locals act impressed when they ask if you are doing the race and you say "yes" and they offer "oohs and aahs" as if you're the first person they've ever met to do an Ironman - which could not possibly be the case if you live here in CDA! But it's a really nice atmosphere to be in...and we certainly feel supported and welcomed.
Easy run with Dustin B. and Jess in the afternoon to shake out our legs and enjoy the cooler weather...did you know that it is possible to run in the summer without becoming a big, super-sweaty mess?! Well, at least if you're here in Idaho and the humidity is super low...it is possible. And enjoyable!
By evening, Chrissie and Jeremiah had arrived - just after an AWESOME meal that Jess made for us. And as our little house came together (minus Cheryl who got in very late Wednesday night), I found myself smiling more...which is saying a lot because traveling with Jess can pretty much just make you smile all day. So I should say that my smile just got bigger and all-encompassing...even if it was mostly an internal smile because I could feel myself fading (still fighting off whatever is trying to pull me down). And I thought how funny it was that a day of pretty easy travel suddenly felt VERY long...whatever that phenomenon, sleep came easily.
And that was good because the sun rises so early here that by 5 a.m. I was stirring again...but managed to go back to sleep until 7 a.m. LUXURY! Time for coffee and pre-workout snack in the back patio area with sweats on to stay warm through the morning chill...and then down to the lake to meet up with Dustin S. and Erin for our first team swim. What a difference from last year for me. Not sure what it was but my pre-race swims last year were not that great. Sure, the water was cold but that wasn't it. I just never felt in the groove or at home (which I usually do in the water) last year during our practice sessions. This year, I felt like I was a CDA fish finding its way back to familiar waters. Wetsuits, goggles, swim cap (not the neoprene one) in place...and off we went. Smooth strokes. A few builds. Everyone feeling good. YAY!
Quick change to running shoes and then a 20-minute out and back with some builds. This felt really good, too...and helped me confirm my race day attire (provided that the forecast stays the same as it is now). Lots of leap-frogging with teammates...a chance to take in some of the run course. (I evidently was really out of it last year b/c in my mind the first part of the course was bordered by only trees on one side...umm...there's a college there...right behind the trees. I saw it this time around!) Then back to the house for showers and off to grab some breakfast at the Bakery by the Lake - YUM! Registration and some IM gear shopping (unnecessary items perhaps but I bought some anyway) and soon we were headed home with the blue wristbands that we'll wear for the next four days in place. Yikes. This is becoming more real.
Some hangout time with Jess on our patio while we were waiting for Jeremiah and Chrissie to do some grocery shopping and soon it was time for another meal - don't judge, I'm going to be exercising for 14 hours or so on Sunday...I need my fuel! The weather remains awesome here so we've been eating outside as much as possible, and there are moments when we're so relaxed that I almost forget I'm doing an Ironman in 4 days! That changes when I look at my gear...and when I see my wrist...and when we do things like bike pick-up.
Steve and Natasha had our bikes ready for us and it was super easy. We were all happy to see our bikes...and they were in tip-top shape! Saw Brad and Jill there - yay...they finally made it! And managed to get the bikes back to our house in only two trips - pretty impressive for having two cars that only hold small bikes.
And then...some more downtime. Our group overall is super chill so that's great. We've all agreed that our house is in a great place - away from the crowds and the vibes that all of the Ironman stuff can create down by Ironman village. It's a funny deal, this Ironman stuff. Sure, it's "serious" in the way that it's serious training and a serious commitment and a serious challenge and something to have serious respect for...but, in my opinion, unless you're a pro, you don't need to take it that seriously. I mean for the rest of us, you should have fun doing it, right? (I hope the pros think it's fun, too, but I know there's more pressure on them...) You should be able to be a little light-hearted and thank the volunteers who want to chat with you and laugh at the folks who are taking it so seriously that they almost run you over with their bikes on the sidewalk along the lake! It's a gift to be able to do this stuff and I think that knowing that lets you walk around here with an "attitude of gratitude" - as cheesy as that sounds - that lets you enjoy it, soak it up, and get ready to have a great day on Sunday. Or maybe that's just what I tell myself to calm my nerves...
On that note, my stomach is growling...hopefully I'm not the only one who thinks it's time for another meal. After all, it's been nearly 4 hours!

here I go again...

Like many things in life, you go to do them again, and you find that they are a completely different experience. Such was training for my second Ironman. In many ways, training for IMCDA 2010 was much more difficult than training for IMCDA 2009 even though that one was my first Ironman.
In 2009, nearly everything was a first for me when I trained…my first 100 miler on the bike, my first 20+ miler running, my first 4K in a wetsuit. And there’s something to be said for novelty…and fear!...when it comes to sticking to a training schedule. It’s exciting to go for each bike ride because it will bring you to a distance that you have never accomplished before on a bike. It’s exciting to finish another long run because you’ve never run that far before…at least not in one morning! And finishing a wetsuit swim that’s nearly 2.4 miles is just plain fun...albeit a bit crazy. And you do it all day in and day out for 6 months because in the back of your mind you have that little voice that says, “What if you can’t really do these distances by June?”
But the second time around you know those distances. You have the confidence that you can do them and that is awesome and powerful. But you also know the pain and challenge of doing them…and those feelings are awesome and powerful, too! And, at least if you’re me, you have different expectations for yourself. Completion is always still the goal; but within that there are more specific goals. Go faster…ride harder…work the hills…focus on cadence…feel the water…be aware of form…be better than you were the time before….but keep having fun because you are doing this for fun…just to name a few.
If you remember, I loved (absolutely loved!) training for an Ironman the first time around…and the second time around was no different in that I still love it. But I was harder on myself. I actually trained less – in terms of hours spent at practice – but I was more focused with my training. Therefore, at each practice, I vowed to give it 100%. Even if that 100% was only about 80% of what I can actually do – it was all that I had on a given day. Last year I sometimes caught myself holding back, always anticipating the next practice and knowing that I had to have something to give to it. This time, I spread my practices out a little more, worked in a day off each week, and trusted that my body would and could recover between practices…therefore giving myself both more downtime but also cutting myself less slack. We’ll see how this method of training works out on June 27!
But it worked out really well during training…and after all, it needs to work for training because that is 6 months leading up to race day. It really can’t all be about race day. If it is, you risk spending 6 months being miserable…and you risk setting yourself up for a huge disappointment.
Lucky for me, I confirmed that I LOVE TRAINING for triathlons. I get a kick out of it. I thrive off of the physical activity and I have tried to learn from the successes I’ve had along the way…as well as the blips I’ve had along the way. I cannot call them “failures” because I don’t think anything that we learn from is a failure, and I’ll be the first to say that I’ve learned as much – if not more – from those very bad practices/runs/swims/bikes as I have from the good ones. For me, my training peels off layers of myself, makes me more vulnerable, makes me think about different parts of my life…and in some bizarre way, I hope it makes me a better, stronger, more open and loving person.
I feel really blessed by the comradery that being part of a team provides me. I have learned something from each and every teammate who’s been by my side through this journey. Some have taught me to laugh more (at myself and at other things); others have taught me to step back and appreciate what our bodies can do. From others I’ve learned that I can run faster or ride more miles or swim more repeats than I thought…or at least I’ve come to believe so by watching their example. From everyone, I’ve felt such an amazing sense of support in every form from the tangible to the intangible. It’s the notes left on my car…it’s the smiles along the trail (or the nods when we can’t muster a smile)…it’s the thumbs up as we pass one another on our bikes…it’s knowing at the end of the day that there are a bunch of other people striving for the same tangible end goal (and many intangible goals along the way...and at the end, too) who appreciate the sweat, the tears, the wind-chapped skin, the numb toes and fingers, the heart-thumping and all-encompassing journey that this experience can take you on…I can’t imagine doing this alone! As with so many other things in life, you learn that who is by your side makes all of the difference…and you learn that you really cannot do it alone.
And the T3 team has also given me wonderful coaches. Coaches who listen. Coaches who care. Coaches who “get” me. Coaches who hear my worries about this upcoming race and then say things like, “Well, let’s imagine it working out really wonderfully…and if it doesn’t, we’ll deal with that together on Monday.” Coaches who tell me when to dial it back and skip a practice and get some sleep. Coaches who say, “I think you can do this run at thus-and-such pace” (which is usually faster than I think I can go) and then applaud me when I do…or coach me through it when I don’t. Coaches who get goosebumps watching me nail a 40 mile ride followed by a 13 mile run. Coaches who are mentors and role models and inspirations and friends. I couldn’t ask for better.
And last but not least…my family and friends. The people who are so dear to me who give me the freedom to do these crazy things. Who might be scared for me but who above all enjoy seeing me happy and fulfilled and know that my life would be a little less of each if I didn’t have this triathlon stuff in it right now. People who will listen to tales about a weekend run and how cold or hot it was or who will tell me that I’m riding distances that I should only be driving. People who have met me for coffee late in the afternoon because I had to ride 80 miles that morning and I’m just not that fast! People who have supported me for YEARS now whether I’ve been ice skating or playing soccer or trying to make the honor roll or running for a class office or changing positions at work. You all are my backbone and the reason I ever had the confidence to try something crazy and new like this as an adult.
Yes, I might be the one who physically carries myself over the 140.6 miles (2.4 mile swim + 112 mile bike ride + 26.2 mile run/a marathon) on Sunday, June 27…but I won’t be out there alone. I’ll be digging deep into years of love and faith and friendship and support…and relying on every ounce of that knowing that I never would have gotten here alone. You’ve been with me along this journey and you’ll be with me in my heart that day. And if you want to see how the journey ends, be looking for #2330 on Sunday...
I hope to be able to update my blog from Idaho but I wanted to make sure to extend my gratitude before I left Austin. From the bottom of my heart, thank you for your friendship, your love, your support, your patience, and everything else that has made this journey worthwhile.

no yoga Monday...

...but I've been enjoying a herbal, holistic cocktail all day as I try to get this sore throat and slight cold to take a back seat to my life! I've got places to go and things to do Mr. Sore Throat Cold.
And even though I'd rather get inspiration from yoga class, I've actually had a little epiphany of my own from this taper sickness (apparently this happens often...it just didn't happen to me last time...although I could have expected it because it's SO like my body to shut down when I actually give it a moment to rest!).
Here's my thought about all of this: my body is trying to get rid of all the sicky germs that are hanging around so that I'm healthy, strong, and ready to go on Sunday. So, thank you for coming to visit early in the week, Mr. Sore Throat Cold...now please know that you will have worn out your welcome by the end of the week, in fact, you might get left behind when I board a plane for Idaho on Wednesday. Don't say I didn't warn you!

daydreaming...

...about lots of different things.
CDA: which is exactly one week from today...and I'm imagining it as a glorious thing (without the sore throat that is currently plaguing me!)...full of highs and lows but nothing that I'm not able to overcome or soak up...feeling strong...smiling...taking in the amazingness of an IM race day...drawing in the energy from everyone and everything around me - and offering it right back to others along the way...going into the swim, bike, and run with the confidence that the last 6 months of training have brought to me and the confidence that my coaches, teammates, friends, and family have in me...
post-CDA: and some mornings of sleeping late...of exercising just as much as I want to for as long as I want to...until my body eventually tells me it's time to get back to training again...more time on the weekends to relax, get together with friends outside of training, and get things done around the house (a few projects I've been neglecting)...and of daydreaming of what the next training adventure will be...after a little time to space out.
vacation time from work: although it will be brief this year I'm really looking forward to the time away from the office...my job is AMAZING (I'm so, so fortunate to love it), but even the most amazing jobs benefit from a little break...glad to have one coming up this week and then another one next month (can't wait to see Gran, too!).
my job: and all of the possibilities that this upcoming year holds...I'm already feeling pretty ambitious about what I can accomplish - some new things on the horizon, some new hopes that we have as college counselors, some old ideas that might finally get set in motion...good stuff.
what's next: who knows what's around the next corner...and I'm not sure why I feel like I'm about to round a corner. Maybe you feel that way when you are about to get a good chunk of time back in your life. Will it stay empty? Well, maybe for a little while; but knowing me, not for very long. I'm excited to see what's next...I feel like it's going to be good, no matter what it is. Maybe it won't be all that different but I will come at it with a different attitude or a different hope or a different perspective. If it's anywhere near as good as the life I've already lived, I'll be all smiles and my heart will be full, full, full.
Happy Father's Day, Dad!!

friday quotation

"I can imagine it working out perfectly," she said.
"I can't," I said.
"No wonder you're so stressed," she said.

Thanks to everyone in my life who is that other voice in my head...the one that CAN imagine it working out perfectly. I'm starting to begin to possibly maybe imagine it myself.

focus, focus, focus

It's the one thing I cannot do right now.
I start something and I can barely finish it - a letter, dinner, an email, a load of laundry, a sentence...
I try to sit down and think about one small thing and my mind immediately goes elsewhere.
I go to pack my bags for CDA and I find myself making a batch of chocolate chip cookies.
I jump into a project at work and I'm suddenly making a list of all of the things that have to be done before school starts in August.
I attempt to write a thoughtful and sincere blog post about IMCDA 2010 and I can't even direct my thoughts enough to do that...
So I'm giving in to the one thing I know I can focus on - the back of my eyelids. Maybe with some sleep I'll have better focus tomorrow!

only triathletes and mathematicians...

...could get so worked up over numbers. But for those of us doing IMCDA in 12 days (YIKES), we now have our bib numbers. So let me introduce myself as 2330. How do I love this number? Let me count the ways...
1) it contains 3 - my favorite number! hooray!
2) okay, the first reason gets another mention because it contains two 3s!!!
3) it's almost a palindrome...okay, "almost" might not really count but I like the symmetry of this number.
4) it's divisible by 5! Thank you, Katy Dooley :)
5) and if you add the first digit to either the second or third digit you get 5!!
6) for my 1st IM, my bib number started with a 1 (#191)...so it's sort of nice that for my 2nd IM, my bib number starts with a 2. (I know this trend won't continue so I'm going with it while I can!)
And finally...it's MY number. Which is why I like it most.
Honestly, I never knew I could care about a number so much. But when you wear it all day and people refer to you by it (sometimes instead of your name), you begin to feel a certain bond to your race number. Good thing I feel like we're already friends. We've got a long day ahead of us on June 27.